5.20.13 [2:47 pm]

As soon as I possibly can (which may be a while because of how expensive it is), I’m getting a nose job.

I’m going to cry from happiness.

My parents are totally fine with it, which means I’m going to start planning ASAP.

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5.16.13 [11:13 pm]

This is going to be a rant about my appearance (surprise, surprise). I tried to let people take Instagram photos and such tonight, but it honestly made me sick to my stomach. I wanted to cry. I hate how I look. I hate how every part of me is wrong. I feel sick and my head is pounding. It seems so over dramatic, but I can barely stand to even look in mirrors. There’s not a single thing I like about myself. I need to be skinner. I need plastic surgery. I need to be someone else.

It would be so nice to just take a selfie and like it. I don’t want to have to take a hundred photos and maybe find one I sort of don’t hate. I see all these beautiful girls on Tumblr and Instagram and it makes me so sad. I would kill to be half as pretty as all these other girls. I guess I’m just stupid, insecure, and narcissistic.

What am I supposed to do when I barely want to leave the house for fear of how ugly and fat I am? It’s fucking exhausting.

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